DREAMING OF BIGGER THINGS...

Do you ever daydream about what it would be like to win the lottery?  It is a fun exercise to play when the work doldrums gets you down.  Here is my wish list:

$50,000 Lottery win
- $25K to retirement savings
- $25K to retiring all debt
with the resulting lovely tax refund that would come from my deposit to retirement savings, that would go on my mortgage

$100,000 Lottery win
- $25K to retirement savings
- $25K to retiring all debt
- $50K to mortgage (that would take YEARS! off)

$1,000,000 Lottery win (this one is fun...)
- mortgage gone
- debt gone
- retirement savings caught up
- $25 k in home improvements - new appliances, redo kitchen, redo front stairs, new floors
- $600K in investments
- $100K in an educational trust for nieces and nephews

I would still have to work with all of the above but the fear of eating cat food in my old age would go away.  Anything over $1,000,000 would just mean nicer shoes, more savings, maybe a new house but really, it would just mean the freedom to make some fun choices.  
Try it some time - it is a really fun exercise to do when the blahs get you down!

Enjoy!!

LOOKING FOR SOMEONE SPECIAL...

Dear Universe,

In the spirit of putting it all out there and going after what I want, here is what I would like in a future partner:

1. Smart – doesn't have to have an off the charts IQ but no one wants to be with an idiot
2. Funny – doesn't need to be a comedian but be able to find the humour in most situations.  Be able to laugh at himself. 
3. Kind
4. Financially stable/successful
5. Can communicate his feelings/thoughts without me having to hitch an F-150 to them and drag them out of him
6. Is a happy person – more positive than negative, good perspective on life.
7. Able to be a partner
8. Decent relationship with ex – doesn’t have to be best friends but should be able to talk/work things thru without lawyers and/or screaming matches
9. Loves his children and has a good relationship with them
10. Able to prioritize – not just work and responsibilities, but the people  in his life.  If he has kids, they are always a priority but able to make me feel like one as well. 
11. Tall enough – doesn’t need to be 6’ 4”, but I would prefer not shorter than me without high heels
12. Affectionate
13. Strength of character
14. Have ethics and a sense of justice
15. Roots for the underdog – doesn’t have to be all the time but sometimes is good
16. Be able to stand up for himself – even if his opinion is the unpopular one
17. Good kisser
18. Good in bed
19. A dog person
20. Good with families
21. Good with people with disabilities
22. Loves to travel
23. Open to adventure
24. Open mind
25. Is ok with my crazy, demanding job
26. Has a life of his own, friends of his own  and wants the same for  me.  
27. Doesn’t sweat the small stuff – we all do occasionally but has enough life experience to know when to fish or cut bait. 
28. Wants to get married again
29. Knows what he wants and goes for it
30. Can keep a secret/be discreet
31. Has dealt with his issues from previous relationships and knows himself. 
32. Is not ugly – please let him not be ugly.  I know that this is really shallow, but come on, I have to look at this face for the rest of my life.  I would like it to be somewhat attractive.
33. Knows that romance, the true kind and not the Hallmark version, is incredibly hot
34. Knows how to listen

I know that this seems like a paragon of virtue but he has to be out there somewhere, someone who has most of these traits. 

Universe, thank for hearing my request.  I will continue my search until I find the one that makes my heart skip a beat and wants want I want - to love and be loved in that crazy, inconvenient, all-consuming way that real love is.  

HELLO...IS THIS STILL ON? IS ANYONE OUT THERE?

I took a break because I felt like I didn't have anything left to say but what I have found, is that I need a place to put some thoughts.  So here I am, 4 years older and hopefully wiser, and still needing to quiet the noise in my head.  

So much has changed and yet nothing has changed.  I guess that is life.  

Here we go again...

Diane aka DiDi

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

To all my American friends both virtual and real.  May you enjoy your friends, family and turkey and have nothing but good things to be thankful for! 

GIVING THANKS!

I know that the Thanksgiving that is about to be celebrated in the 50 states that make up the USA is not my Thanksgiving being a Canadian girl and all - but I am sitting here, writing and giving some BIG thanks right now. 

Wilson has agreed to the settlement amount and within 2-3 weeks, I will be a legally separated woman.  I know that sounds like a weird thing to be thankful for but after this crazy, chaotic year - to have this huge. looming issue come to a close so that I can face 2011 on my own terms is massive for me. 

So today internet, in the spirit of Thanksgiving, here is just some of what I am thankful for:

- this crazy, chaotic year - without it I would never have found out how strong I really am
- my new job - for being a good change for me
- friends - both virtual and real - I am a better person because of you and them
- family - they are truly a safe place for me to land and accept me for who I am
- love - while it may not be the love of one person right now, I am so lucky to have so much love in my life. 
- hope - for 2011 to be better, for love, for whatever comes my way
- this blog - my safe, anonymous place where I can get rid of the thoughts that rattle around my brain
- Diet Coke - mmmmm mmmmm good!
- pretty shoes - nuff said
- Arthur - while he is now Wilson's exclusively and I can no longer see or touch him - he is still my brown boy and I will love him forever.  There will be another dog soon but none will ever be like Arthur!

I am a lucky, loved girl who is thankful for all that has come my way this year - the good, the bad and yes even the ugly. Without it all, I would never know how far I have come or what I am capable of.  So here I sit - a happy girl giving thanks for it all!

ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS...

If loving Donny Osmond is wrong, I don't won't to be right! 

I know, I know, I have been absent but I have lots of excuses:
- travel, travel and more travel.  Seriously, I was in China
- sick, sick and more sick.  Not kidding, heinous cold
- Jet lag - spend 20 hours on a flight and then try to be funny or creative
- work.  A significant lottery win is required to relieve me from this daily 9-5 affliction. 

Anyway, just watching Dancing with the Stars and my love of Donny Osmond is still alive!  If that makes me uncool, so be it! 

I have many posts started and saved.  Stay tuned, many posts are a-coming!  Missed you all!!!

AND AWAY WE GO!

Where did I leave off???  Oh yeah - a great first date.  Seriously - in the world of first dates - this one was world class in my books.  So I am thinking to myself - a 2nd date should be in the bag.  Right?   Wrong!  Now, you all know the ending to our story so just play along here. 

We have the great, first date - he meets my gorgeous dog, we eat ice cream - it is all pointing to date #2.  I emailed the next morning to say thanks, I had a great time and it would be great to do it again.  The response - lukewarm at best.  As I read it my brain started gearing up for an implosion.  The hell?  Did I imagine the great date?  This email, is of course forwarded, discussed A LOT and analyzed by many a great girlfriend. 

Week 1 - much discussion amongst DiDi and girlfriends that he must be busy. 

Week 2 - much discussion amongst DiDi and girlfriends that he is an ass*

Week 3-5 - DiDi has officially given up

* - this is before "He's just not that into you!"

Now, somewhere around Week 4 of no call, no follow, NOTHING - I had to go to a tradeshow and I knew that he would be there.  Y'all can imagine the painstaking detail I went through to look amazing at this show.  This was my attempt at "I will show you what you are giving up Wilson!" or another loose translation of this is "Eff you!"

So I got back to my life - working, walking the dog, hanging out with friends - all in all, lots of fun.  One Monday morning, I come into work and there is a voicemail waiting for me.  I don't know about you but I hate voicemail that is waiting for me in Monday morning - it usually means that someone has been into work on the weekend and they want to see me to dump copious amounts of work on me.  However, this time it is not - it was Wilson!  I am listening to the voice mail on my speaker phone and I hear his voice and I cannot pick up the phone fast enough.  He is calling to ask me to a Lobster Party this weekend.  FINALLY!  After 5 weeks of waiting, I finally get a 2nd date.  I am to call him back if I am interested.  ReRe, of course, from the minute she heard Wilson's voice on the speakerphone, ran her ass over to my desk.  We discussed waiting to call back to appear 'cool' but let's be clear about this - I have never been a 'Rules" girl and I never will.  I wanted to go so I called him back within 10 minutes of getting that call.  Date 2 booked!  Let the stressing about the wardrobe begin immediatly! 

Finally, after many consultations, it is determined to appear casually sexy.  Don't want to look like I am trying to hard, etc.  FYI - again, not sure I am a casually sexy kind of girl but I gave it my best shot.  Black, sleeveless V-neck top, with casual drawstring pants and pretty shoes.  Hair was flipped and makeup was light.  The twice-a-day workouts also helped because I managed to lose 3 pounds before the date.  So wish I could do that these days!

He picks me up - actually parks the car and comes up because he wants to see the dog!  This gains him HUGE points with me because Maggie was a huge part of my life and if she liked you, it went a long way!  We leave, go to the party and are the 2nd people there.  I am handed a drink right away and realize very quickly that this is going to be a long drunken night and I better pace myself.  More people start to arrive and at one point, Wilson is off helping our host get the lobster pots ready and I find myself surrounded by a gaggle of women who all know each other and are fairly new, first-time moms.  I now know that Wilson needs jobs to do,  and likes to help out at functions.  In other words, he needs to feel useful.  But at this point, on date #2, I did not know this - all I know is my date is no where to be found.  Once the conversation in my group leaned toward potty training, breast feeding and mommy & me play groups - I excused myself and went and hid in the bathroom.  Apparenly I was gone a long time because Wilson came looking for me and knocked on the bathroom door.  After I explained about being Mommed to death, he kept me near him and made sure to introduce me to nice people. 

Something to keep in mind here - our host Terry is known for throwing great parties.  Lots of booze, etc.  For some reason his wife (now ex-wife) never did any appetizers.  So everyone just feasted on cocktails.  Also, for some unknown reason, we never ate dinner at this lobster party until between 9 or 10 pm.  I think you all get where I am going with this because when all you eat are olives and vodka for hours, a party can really get going in a BIG way.  This was my 2nd date with Wilson!

Finally, at around 9:30 pm, we sit down to dinner - and yup, you guessed I am DRUNK!  However, I am also in great company as my date is drunk and so is the rest of the party!  We eat, flirt, laugh, flirt, pretty much everything and flirt - all fueled by my dear friend alcohol.  We help with clean up and dishes and by this time, I have lost the ability to enunciate and walk in a straight line.  I think it is 2:00 am, but apparenly it is only 11:00 pm.   The rest of the evening's details, while a bit fuzzy, will be left to your imaginations, but suffice it to say, after that we were officially "together"! 

Any hoo, we begin dating and I knew this one was different.  There was no game playing - he called when he said he was going to call, wanted to see me, introduced me to his friends, met mine, walked my dog with me and became someone that I knew I wanted to spend more and more time with.  I kept waiting for the shoe to fall from the sky and bonk me on the head - in other words, kept waiting for him to turn into an asshole but it never seemed to happen.  Finally I realized he wasn't going to be an asshole to me because he wasn't an asshole.  I had finally met a grown-up and he wanted to be with me and was very clear about this.  I was falling in love and it felt good and right and true.  Finally after much waiting and dating of assholes, I realized that they were just practice for the real thing.

Next installment - how do we keep the music playing?

I'M BACK!

Wow – have I ever been gone a long time or what! I have no real excuse other than feeling devoid of all creativity and anything funny to say. My job has reached a new level of insanity regarding workload/travel and general all-round craziness that it sapped all amusing anecdotes from me. Damn that ambition that made me leave my lovely old job where I had time to blog, read blogs I love, keep up on Flickr and in general do anything else but work.



Anyhoo, here I am - with my new ‘back to school’ mentality or as I like to think of it as 'back to blog'.  Here are my observations du jour! 

 Jon Gosselin – ENOUGH! Please shut up, go away and get off the cover of US magazine if you ‘hate’ the media attention. Go be a father for the love of God!


Kate Gosselin’s hair – better but still – it amazes me that her haircut made the CNN crawl!


Mad Men – I LOVE JON HAMM! This should come as no surprise to anyone who has read this blog of mine. Also adore Joan Holloway! This show is the total best!!


Business Travel – doing a lot of it and it sucks! That is all I have to say about that!


Shoes – had to go to Atlanta for business. See above for how I feel about business travel. BUT – while I was there, I bought 2 divine pairs of shoes. There is an upside to business travel after all – shopping in different cities!


Grey hair – 2 questions – why does it have to show up at all? Why does it have to show up so damn fast after a cut and colour? Stupid grey hair!!


Traffic – It is such a part of my daily life for the last year. But what really annoys me is how the slightest bit of precipitation causes traffic to slow down to the point where I think I can carry my car faster to work. Is this just a Toronto thing or does it happen in your city?


Summer – where did it go?

Here is hoping the 'amusing anecdote' part of my brain makes a comeback soon!

BECAUSE I SUCK AGAIN...

I give you this picture of Arthur at 9 weeks to view until my life becomes less crazy and I can write again!  I have no idea when that is but until then, I give you the flying ear.

UPDATED

At long last I have updated my blogroll - but have noticed that it has significantly shrank in the last while (since I got a real job and started working instead of blogging - damn that ambition and need for money to pay for my pretty shoe habit!).

Who are you reading internet?  Who should I check out these days?

TRAVEL

I love to travel and that is a good thing as I do it a lot for my job. I love the excitement that getting on a plane brings me – even if I have been to that city or place many times before. It is the act of going away and of coming back that never ceases to put me in awe of how far one person can go in an airplane.



However, because I fly a lot, every time I take off or land I think about crashing. Not sure why I do – I am not afraid of flying at all, in fact I rather like it. However, it never fails, every time I am in a plane I think about crashing. With the news lately of the Air France flight that went down in the Atlantic, I have been thinking a lot about those passengers and what they went through. I can picture these passengers on their flight doing all that you do when you get on a plane – getting on, settling in, trying to make sure that you get good arm rest room, getting snacks, beverages, pillows, blankets, choosing what movies to watch, talking with their kids, thinking about their loved ones on the other end when they land or all that they want to do on their latest travel adventure.


When I think about crashing, all I think about is that if we do crash, I want it to be fast so that no one, especially me, suffers. I also think “Did I tell Wilson and Arthur that I love them? Did I leave the iron on? Did I pack my own pants or Wilson’s this time?” I think about these passengers and send a fervent wish to the universe that these passengers did not know what was happening and that their last moments were not filled with panic, confusion, fear and suffering. I hope that they could only enjoy their flight until it was too late and then it was over before they knew what was happening.


But really, the worst is for those loved ones coming to the airport to meet them, holding signs, flowers, gifts and waiting with open hearts and arms only to be told that they were never going to see these friends, family, lovers, loved ones ever again. There is no balm for that kind of pain and suffering as it is a wound that never really heals. So today, I think about all of them and am feeling sad. I will think about them the next time I am sitting on a plane with thoughts of crashing going through my head and know that because of them, I left for my journey making sure Wilson and Arthur know that they are loved and that they love me back.

HONESTLY...

edder, you rock for sharing this award with me.   I am sorry for taking so long to post - that damn job of mine gets in the way of my blogging.  So, in order to accept this award, I have to share 10 honest things about me with the Internet.   Ummm...I think that the Internet is going to scream 'nuff said' with the minutae but here goes:

1. I hate it when 'educated' people say irregardless.  Seriously - it is not a word stop using it.  Also, please learn the difference between your and you're. 
2. Rude people really annoy me.  It takes a moment to be polite and no one will spit in your food that way. 
3. I asked my husband to marry me. 
4. I can't believe that I am going to be 43 this year.  Sweet mother of God - when did I get old???
5. I am an aunt to 8 nieces and nephews and a great aunt to 12 grand nieces and nephews.  Can you tell I am from a big family???
6. I have a freakish love of good luggage.  I travel a lot for work and am always looking at other people's luggage in the airport.
7. Pedicures are my favourite spa thing to do - nothing makes me feel better than pretty toes!
8. I have a HUGE fear of snakes.  I can't even look at them on TV. 
9. I have zero athletic ability - and I really do mean zero. Walking and chewing gum showcases all of my coordination abilities - and even then, I fail.  Nothing makes my husband laugh harder than when I get invited to participate in some sporting activity.
10. I often have the sense of humour of a 12 year old boy.  Toilet humour makes me laugh my ass off.  Superbad is one of my all time favourite movies. 

There you go!  You now know more about me than my mom. 

MEMEMEMEME

edder wanted me to share more minutae of my life with you dear internet so here it goes.

1. What is your current obsession?

As always in the summer – So You Think You Can Dance! I love it – not sure why as I am not the demographic but I never miss a show!


2. What are you wearing today?
Brown pants, pink and white tank and a light pink short sleeved blouse. Trying to be spring like on a chilly day.

3. What's for dinner?
Roasted chicken from Sunday and salad. Am down 10 pounds and want to keep the scale moving lower.


4. What would you eat for your last meal?
Macaroni & cheese, turkey with stuffing, scalloped potatoes – basically carbohydrates and cheese with a bottle of fantastic red wine.


5. What's the last thing you bought?
Pretty flowers for our garden. However, as we are just about to start construction on our new deck in the backyard – it could be a contractors’ services for the next 3 weeks.


6. What are you listening to right now?
The typing fingers of my colleagues.


7. What do you think of the person who tagged you?
edder is a fantastic person – funny, smart, loyal, gorgeous and very tall.

8. If you could have a house totally paid for, fully furnished anywhere in the world, where would you like it to be?
The French Rivieria – gorgeous, good food, fantastic shopping and easy access to the rest of Europe.


9. If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go?
Denver – to visit my beloved Kacy


10. Which language do you want to learn?
I have always regretted that I never learned how to speak French.


11. What's your favourite quote (for now)?
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” – Eleanor Roosevelt


12.What's your favourite colour?
Blue – not just any blue but that perfect, pretty blue (a combination of sky blue and Forget-me-not blue) that goes with just about everything. It is so hard to find and when I do I buy multiple pieces of it in that colour.


13. What is your favourite piece of clothing in your own wardrobe?
A dress I bought a million years ago and can no longer fit into. However, when Wilson and I had split for a while (this was of course before we got married), I wore it to an event that I knew he was going to be at but he did not know that I was going to be at. I had lost a ton of weight and looked like a million bucks in it. When he saw me, he looked stunned and we got back together the next weekend. I keep to remind me of the power of cleavage and a good fitting dress. Also, my wedding dress.


14. What is your dream job?
A wealthy retired woman who volunteers and gets to travel a lot.


15. What's your favourite magazine?
Vanity Fair, Vogue (LOVE Anna Wintour) and Toronto Life


16. If you had $100 now, what would you spend it on?
Summer clothes


17. What are you going to do after this?
Drive home, smooch a dog and make dinner


18. What are your favourite films?
The American President, The Sound of Music, Singing in the Rain, A Few Good Men, Best in Show, Waiting for Guffman


19. What's your favourite fruit?
Apples – crunchy and good with cheese and mangos


20. What inspires you?
A good book, a great blog, a person with ideals who isn’t afraid to stand up for them, the ocean, smart people


21. Your favourite books?
So many – A Separate Peace, Anne of Green Gables, The Inn at Lake Devine, A Thousand Splendid Suns and the list could go on and on


22. Do you collect anything?
I love purses, shoes, sunglasses and luggage. However as we are now paying for the services of a contractor, all of those loves are on hold.


23. What are you currently reading?
Then She Found Me by Elinor Lipman


24. What's your earliest memory?
Being in the car with my brother when we picked him up from the adoption agency (I was about 2 ½ and thinking – WHO IS THAT AND WHAT IS HE DOING WITH MY MOM????


25. By what criteria do you judge a person?
By what have they done for me lately! HA – actually I try not to be to judgey but often fail miserably. I do try to judge people by how they treat others, small children, old people and pets. Also, because I have a developmentally challenged brother, how people treat those that are different from them. I have seen some of the most “Christian” people be unspeakably rude to my brother and then they are dead to me.

edder wanted me to share this others so I tag KK to share her details with everyone. 

MEET MY NEW PET - PEEVE!

edder had this list of her 15 Pet Peeves and since I was feeling a lack of imagination and in need of a blog post, here is my list.  Share yours - you know that you want to and its fun!

1. People who use the word "irregardless".  IT IS NOT A REAL WORD!
2. Body odour.  Seriously, in this country where water is cheap and available, there is no excuse.  Do you hear me Toronto taxi drivers!
3. Empty milk containers in the fridge.  Wilson - this has never been funny - NEVER!
4. Empty toilet paper rolls (however I do this to Wilson all the time)
5. Dirty dishes on the counter for more than 1 day - just put the damn things in the dishwasher already!
6. Kitchen cupboard doors left open
7. Bugs
8. Crying children on airplanes.  I fly A LOT and you would think that I wouldn't hear it any more but I DO!
9.  People who wear their blackberries on their hip at a social event - like their children's birthday party.  We get it, you love your 'Berry - but seriously, the whole world has one, no one cares!
10. Tattoos - think about when you get old how that will look!
11.  Facial piercings - most specifically - tongue and lip.  OW and EEWW!
12. People who drive stupidly slow because they are talking on their cell phones.  Learn to mulit-task would you!
13. Jessica Simpson - in fact the whole Simpson family - SO DO NOT CARE!
14. People who tell me that Diet Coke in the morning is gross.  You drink your dark caffeinated beverage your way and I will drink it mine.  I don't judge you - don't judge me!
15. Bad breath - seriously, have you never heard of breath mints?

That was fun and I so could have gone on and on and on!  Come on internet, I showed you mine, show everyone yours!

BECAUSE I STILL SUCK...

A little Hugh goes a long way! 

BECAUSE I SUCK AS A BLOGGER...

Because work is so crazy right now and I am on the road for the next 3 weeks with nary a moment to breathe, my ability to update you dear Internet on my comings and goings and general life stuff is right up there with my ability to walk and chew gum.  In other words - non existent. 

So instead, I give you some pretty things to look at until I can once again sit down and bore you with the trivialities of my existance. 

Enjoy!

PROUST QUESTIONNAIRE

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WHO IS MICH?

Who is the gorgeous girl?  Go and find out for yourself - you won't be sorry you did!!

Congratulations Mich on your 100th post!

EVERYBODY TAKE ONE STEP TO THE RIGHT, THERE IS NEW BLOGGER IN TOWN

Internet, my dear friend edder has joined us in blogging and I wanted give her a shout out.  This is one funny chica whose writing has always amused the beejeesus out of me.   

Welcome to the Internet edder!  You totally rock!!

PS - if you read her latest post, the boobs mentioned - they be mine!

HAPPY BLOGAVERSARY TO ME!

Two years ago today was my first blog post!  Thank you Internet for the laughs, support and friendships.  You totally rock!