Sunday, June 22, 2008

I HATE BACHELORETTE PARTIES!

I went to a stagette last night where I was the OLDEST person there. I am so not kidding about that. Here are some of the highlights of the evening!

  • I heard more times than I can count that "Wow! You look REALLY good for being almost 42!"
  • I rode on a school bus with a hardwood floor and a stripper pole AND karaoke
  • For many of the girls there - I their worst nightmare. I married Wilson at 40 and as they are all 30 and under thought when they heard that I got married at 40 - they thought to themselves Eeeek! I hope I am not as old as her when I get married! I have seen the look before so I know when girls think that.
  • I also did the math - when I turn 50 none of those girls will yet be 40. God - it is 9:30 am and just writing that sentence makes me want to start drinking again.
  • EVERYONE else got carded while walking into the first bar - EXCEPT ME! The doorman just waved me through. The hell? Why not card the ENTIRE group. Why single me out as the person most in need of Botox!
I will say that I rocked a pair of navy Stuart Weitzman's, took my new early birthday Burberry purse, wore my Citizen of Humanity jeans. I may have been the oldest person there but I looked good. Being old does have its advantages - you can afford really nice accessories.
Then I came home, called ReRe and bitched mightily about the evening while drinking 1/2 a bottle of wine that was left on our counter.
I hate bachelorette parties!
PS - to add insult to injury, Arthur decided to chew my beautiful navy blue Stuart Weitzmans. He has never chewed a shoe before but decided to pick today to experiment with shoes. I am going for some retail therapy - replace my shoes and shop until I feel better.

4 comments:

Muffy Willowbrook said...

Holy Crap - that sounds like a shitastic evening. Not to mention, being older you have more confidence, independence and smarts than any twirpy Bachelorette that enjoys riding in a big bus with a stripper pole singing karaoke.

ew.

Emmie Jo said...

LOL! I just found your blog and I'm hooked! You are hilarious!

I just had a similar night out like this where everyone in the bar was seriously 12 years old. Good times.

How did the retail therapy go?

The Sorority said...

Emmie Jo - the retail therapy when great! New pair of Stuart Weitzman's, new dress AND a top. Then on Monday went to H&M and found a cheap skirt and top. I am much happier!

kk said...

sounds like Aruthur has good tase! =)

and sounds like a nightmare. I posted something similar a while back about a baby shower I attended.

Yep. Only girl at the table without kids. (and of course, the oldest!)