Thursday, November 04, 2010


I have always believed that if you really want something, write it down and then send it out to the Universe.  I also believe that you can’t just wish for stuff and then POOF! magically find someone who is everything on it without working on yourself either.  So that is what I am doing in this time of flux – really figuring out what I like, want, need so that when the next great guy comes along, I will be ready to take the leap. 

So universe, here is hoping that you are listening because here is what I would like to find in a boy:  

  1. Honest – with himself and with me
  2. Caring
  3. Kind
  4. Financially responsible/successful – I am not talking millionaire here but someone who has been able to grow their career as I have and has found success
  5. Smart
  6. Loyal
  7. Has a sense of humour – finds me funny, makes me laugh, gets the overall joke in life, sees humour in every day things, can laugh at himself
  8. Tall enough that I can wear high heels – I am a girl and I love pretty shoes - nuff said
  9. Emotionally intelligent/good sense of self/comfortable in his skin – knows who he is and is OK with that, won't be a pushover with me, will stand up to me if Iam out of line but will also stand up for me
  10. Adventurous – I don't mean crazy adventurer cliff diver but willing to try something once even if he might not be good at it.  Has a zest for life and living
  11. Not fat – I am no hard bodied girl and I am not asking for a super duper fit guy but someone who takes care of themself, somewhat active and is not a couch potato all of the time. 
  12. Loves dogs – Anyone who wants a life with me will have to be used to the fact that there will always be a dog in the house and had better understand the responsibility that goes with that 
  13. Love of travel – I love it and want to continue this throughout my life not as a tourist but as a traveler
  14. Decent relationship with ex – especially if there are children involved.  Divorce is not easy ever but if you chose to have children with your former spouse, you have to rise above the crap and develop a new relationship that can be at cordial.
  15. Respect – for himself, other people, women
  16. Confident – nothing is sexier than a confident man
  17. Passionate – about life but also about me.  Not to be too inappropriate here but wants to have a healthy, active life in the bedroom
  18. Affectionate – holding hands, kissing, hugs – touch is very important to me
  19. Cares about the little things in life – I don’t need him to remember the day we first kissed but remembers when I have important stuff coming up and asks about it. 
  20. Communicator – not easy but you have to be willing to talk about anything – easy or difficult. 
  21. Willingness to be vulnerable – everyone struggles with this but I do believe that when you love someone and trust them enough to be in a relationship, you have to be willing to show them your best and worst.  You have to be willing to trust your partner enough to show those parts of you that no one else sees
  22. Non judgemental – as much as humans can be – no biases or bigotry allowed
  23. Gets relationships - understands that they are a marathon not a sprint and won't bolt for the door when the going gets rough
  24. Has figured out a balance in his life between work, family, friends, etc
  25. Has been able to establish good friend relationships - I have amazing friends who mean the world to me and would want the same for my partner
But most of all, that he wants a real relationship with me and that he gets that a real relationship is so many things all at once - joyous, crazy, passionate, amazing, trying, best thing, knee buckling, frustrating - and yet would not have it any other way.  Spending your life with someone and sharing all that goes with it is one of the toughest yet most rewarding things you can do and I want someone who understands that and is willing to take the leap with me. 
So all in all - that is what I am looking for and fingers crossed that I might find someone who has most of these qualities and that I am most of what is on his list too.  Until that time, I will keep working on me and having fun while I do it.  Life is too short to dwell on what is missing when you have so much good right in front of you. 

1 comment:

Emily Jo said...

You, my internet friend, are amazing. You know exactly what you want/need in your life and you won't settle for anything less. The funny thing is, my list reads almost identical to yours! Great minds think alike. :)