Monday, February 02, 2009


Once Christmas is over, I cannot wait for the heinous white stuff to be gone and spring to arrive.  It seems that it never will some days as more of that effing white stuff falls from the sky, makes my drive to and/or from work absolute hell and in general just pisses me off. 

However this was sent to me recently and I had to laugh out loud at it.  For those of you who suffer through winter along with us - you can relate.  For those of you in sunnier climes, who do not have snow, extreme cold and dry, chapped skin - I hate you all - but you can pity those of us who were not as smart as you in choosing a place to spend our lives. 

50° Fahrenheit (10° C)
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
Canadians plant gardens.

35° Fahrenheit (1.6° C)
Italian Cars won't start
Canadians drive with the windows down

32° Fahrenheit (0 ° C)
American water freezes
Canadian water gets thicker.

0° Fahrenheit (-17.9° C)
New York City landlords finally turn on the heat.
Canadians have the last cookout of the season.

-60° Fahrenheit (-51° C)
Mt. St. Helens freezes.
Canadian Girl Guides sell cookies door-to-door.

-100° Fahrenheit (-73° C)
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Canadians pull down their ear flaps.

-173° Fahrenheit (-114° C)
Ethyl alcohol Freezes.
Canadians get frustrated when they can't thaw the keg

-460° Fahrenheit (-273° C)
Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops.
Canadians start saying "cold, eh?"

-500° Fahrenheit (-295° C)
Hell freezes over.
The Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup

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